Quick Update

Over the last two years, I feel like I spent half of this blog talking about how excited I am for the b-school experience and then the other half talking about how I'm sad it's almost over!

It's true that the experience just whizzes by. Even now, I can't believe that next week is our last week of classes! This term, I took a pretty light load of classes so I only had class on one day a week. The other four days, I spent time doing work for my internships, going to my workout class, and traveling. I got to see H a lot this past month which has been a lot of fun and gets me even more excited about moving home after school.

That being said, I still don't know when/where I'll be working for my first rotation for work. One thing that I've really learned over the years is that I'm bad at waiting. I'm a naturally anxious person who loves to plan things out, so having uncertainty about my future (outside the realm of my control) is the ultimate test of patience and will. Hopefully I'll find out soon, but until then, I can just pray for a good outcome and enjoy the present moment.

I have less than a month left in NYC. I'm sad this chapter of my life is coming to an end, but the next chapter is going to be amazing that I'm antsy to get to it. Moving home, starting my job, getting married... it's going to be a fun ride :)

Love,
V

Reflective

Last night I had a nice heart-to-heart with one of my school friends reflecting back on our MBA experience and about what we feel like we got out of the experience. We both agreed that while we learned some technical things in classes, the biggest lessons we learned from the experience were about soft skills and personal development.

The big thing that we hear over and over is that you cannot effectively manage others until you have an understanding of yourself. I really feel like the last two years I've developed a deeper sense of self-awareness and been able to change myself for the better with this new insight. I've realized that I have the ability to innately read the emotions of others, and the ability to take on other perspectives. This has helped me be a caring, trusted colleague/friend and is the root of my agreeable nature. I've also learned that, while I might feel insecure about how I present myself, others perceive me to be more competent, capable and even a little bit competitive than I realize. When I read that report and feedback, I was actually quick shocked because I never thought of myself as competitive!

As I continue in my development and enter the next phase of my career, I really want to work on speaking up. I've been given feedback from so many people that I need to take more ownership of my ideas in meetings (instead of quietly circulating them around afterwards). I'm not really sure where that insecurity stems from, but I need to work on my "blirtatiousness" and learn to just commit to 10-seconds of bravery and share my idea when it comes to me. I inherently edit the things I say, especially in professional settings, but I feel that learning to be more bold in meetings could really take me to the next level.

So here's to looking deeper inside and being okay with what we find!

Cheers,
Vi

Being a Grown Up

Coming to business school, I've been able to make a lot of friends who are older than myself. Not significantly older, but people who have 5-8 years more experience than I do. I think what's been surprising to me is how similiar they are to myself - share in the same wonders, fears, worries. I've always imagined that by a certain age, I would suddenly have clarity on life and with this new wisdom, I would be able to smartly navigate the world I so clearly understood. Through this experience, I guess I'm learning that this is not the care. Life will always be a bit hazy, people will never mature completely, and there will always be a bit of confusion in growing up.

I'm learning to become okay with that and in a weird way, it's kind of liberating. I had always felt like I was waiting for some kind of epiphany, but it looks like it doesn't work that way. Life is just a continual series of lessons and learnings, there is no magical "corner" that you turn around.

BTW I totally think "learnings" is a word even though I get spell-checked every time with that word.

LEARNINGS!!!

NYC Bucket List

1. Cloisters - REMOVE
2. Wave Hill - REMOVE
3. Coney Island - REMOVE
4. Flushing for Chinese food
5. Gramercy Tavern
6. ABC Kitchen 
7. Lincoln Center performance
8. Go on an inside tour of a luxury brand

Ash Wednesday

I feel like it was only a few months ago that I was writing my first posts on this blog about how excited I was to go to business school and now, I'm almost done. The next few months are going to be lots of fun (with trips to Florida, Japan and Puerto Rico) and bittersweet excitement as my MBA experience comes to an end. I have mixed feelings about graduation - part of me is sad that I'm already done with grad school and the other (slightly larger) part can't wait to move onto the next phase of my life.

This semester, my goal is to focus on experiencing as much of b-school and NYC as I can. Sometimes I feel like I can get wrapped up in obsessing over the "it" pair of shoes or handbag that I simple *must* own. As we head into the Lenten season in my final semester, I'm trying to recenter myself to focus on making memories and the positive side of things - my relationships, experiences and life changes. I need to learn to accept what I cannot control and to appreciate the blessings that I have in my life. You only live once, so you need to make each moment count and love the gifts you have.

LDR

No, I'm not going to post about not some wacky business school acronym! :) I wanted to reflect a little bit about long-distance relationships and how people work through them.

First, some context - H and I have spent a lot of our relationship doing long distance. For us, I think it's helped build a stronger bond; being long-distance has made us actively prioritize our relationship in our daily lives and appreciate more the time that we do spend together. Going to business school on the opposite coast was more challenging than our previous times apart (SF to LA) and, admittedly there was an adjustment period, but ultimately it worked out for us. I strongly believe that successful long-distance relationship are possible and potentially even good for relationships.

On the other side, I've seen a lot of b-school relationships fail, especially during first-year students who are recently separated from their pre-school companions. There is the myth of "Black Monday", the Monday after business school when students return single after breaking up with their S/O over their first holiday back at home. It's kind of a sad phenomenon when you consider that the S/O was probably supportive of their decision to go to school (and applying to business school is the hardest part of the experience). However, the b-school environment is so unique from any other experience and temptation looms large, so it is a sad reality that b-school ends many relationships.

Reflecting back, I think some things we did that helped over the past two years are:

• Making sure to keep each other apprised of new people and things - coming to b-school was an overwhelming experience. You meet a lot of people.. fast. I always felt like it was important to share what (and with who) I was doing things with. Even though these people were primarily faceless to H, it helped him experience with  me the environment and helped future conversations have more context as friendships and new hobbies developed.
• Finding a time to speak and committing to it - especially with the time change, this was one of the first things that we struggled with. The hours you keep in business school vary a LOT, because there are definitely times of play and times for work. Whereas H's schedule was relatively stable, mine was all over the place so it took some time for us to figure out a rhythm, but once we did we stuck to it.
• Keeping it sweet :) - these days, it's so easy to drop a email or text to remind each other that we're thinking of them even though we are far apart.

Just some thoughts! :)

Cheers,
Vi

27!

Yesterday I turned 27. I had a nice birthday dinner with some girls from school, and then some drinks at a nearby wine bar. It was simple and low key, filled with stores, laughter and a good food/drink - exactly what I hoped for!

I'm realizing as I get older that the things I cherish are simple and sweet. I occasionally get obsessed with material things, but I hope to remember that those things bring only quick moments of happiness. One of the things we learned in behavioral economics is about how humans adapt to new situations much quicker than they realize. What this means is that buying a new purse of pair of shoes may seem of paramount importance in one moment, but once you buy it, you will quickly adapt to ownership of that item, will value the ownership of it less over time, and quickly be fixated on the next thing. It's an endless (and expensive) cycle. As I move towards my 30's (eek!), I want to learn to not only simplify my life, but also my desires for materials things.

Aside from that, I am very excited about what 27 has to offer - my final semester of business school, graduation, a move to a mystery location, a new job, and WEDDING PLANNING! 27 promises to be a great year and I can't wait.

Cheers!

Back in NYC

I'm back in the Big Apple for the last go! Coming back to NYC after a long break is always a rough transition - it's so hard for me to say goodbye to H and family/friends back in SF, but strange enough, once I get out of the subway an into my Manhattan neighborhood, I realize that this is feels a little bit like home to me too.

I think sometimes I'm unfair about my NYC living experience. When people ask me about it, I always smile and shrug, saying it's fun for a little bit but not for me. Saying that kind of discounts my experience. NYC is a fantastic place and 10 years ago, 16-year-old Vi only dreamt of coming to NYC and seeing all the lights in person (H would make it a reality for me 4 years later, taking me to NYC for the first time). There is so much energy, life and adrenaline here and, while it is not a great fit for me in the long-term, in the short-term it is just right.

Living in NYC has given me a sense of independence, away from the security and luxuries of home and taught me that I am okay all by myself and that I can make a life from scratch. That is a tremendously powerful thing and I am glad that I had this opportunity to experience because it's helped me become a better person.

So here's to the next 5.5 months in the city that never sleeps :)

New Year, New Goals!

Happy new year, all! I'm really excited about the year to come since it will surely be an exciting one with my upcoming graduation and return to the "real world"! As the new year begins, I am so appreciative of what 2012 brought me - great times with friends, a great summer internship which brought on a job offer from my dream company, and a proposal from H, the love of my life among so many blessings. I am sure that 2013 will be equally wonderful, filled with new experiences, leanings and surprises.

This year, I have a few resolutions:
1. Be more patient and understanding with friends and family.
2. Journal more - At least once every week.
3. Learn to cook - At least few easy dishes.
4. Exercise more regularly - At least 2 times a week.

Here goes!

Love, V